220245

32195

5680

464

855

124641

turtwink:

yabba dabba done with ur shit

image

(via asian)

421471

fairhies:

If I reply with “oh” I either don’t give a fuck or I feel like i’ve been punched in the throat

(via pride)

11614

414145

seejelly:

two years ago i was licking a lollipop and some dude said “watching a girl eat a lollipop is a great way to see how well she gives blowjobs” so i bit the lollipop in half and spit it out 

(Source: standardgaydad, via asian)

89185

492528

bosxe:

perfectvic:

LITERALLY MY FAVORITE

This is so much better than any russian roulette or “poison cookie” analogy.

249

kaliforhnia:

Tbh if you piss me off i will ignore your ass for days and not even give a shit about it and I’m not chasing after anyone that treats me like shit lmao fuck that man

448797

have you ever just cried because you’re you

(Source: awkwardvagina, via dead-current)

381183

goodbyemisery:

i went into a whole foods and got to hear a woman arguing with a guy at the meat counter because she wanted grass fed organic chicken and he was desperately trying to explain to her that chickens don’t eat grass

(via fake-mermaid)

619374

gaarabaconclooney:

sparrow-and-nightingale-221b:

ughsos:

in elementary school i hit this kid cause he said i cant punch and i broke his nose and then my stepdad picked me up and the office was like “you have to say sorry” but then the kid was like “but she proved me wrong, she doesn’t have to say sorry” ladies and gentlemen my best friend of many many years

this is violently beautiful

Marry him.

(Source: calumswife, via dead-current)